Possibly the Best Craigslist Ad Ever

Craigslist is filled with all kinds of weird and odd things individuals are trying to sell. Sometimes you'll find bargains, Nigerian Princes who want to give you free money, and other times junk. This ad, for a 2001 Dodge Viper, is good for a laugh, but not much else. $30K for a 01 Viper with a rebuilt title isn't really a bargain after all. Take a look at the context from the ad below or go to the posting if it's still up. You'll enjoy it.

 

http://providence.craigslist.org/cto/5659594852.html

2001 Dodge Viper For Sale $30k

Okay. Full disclosure. I almost killed myself in it.
It is VERY powerful. Extremely, EXTREMELY fast.
I've driven Ferrari's that don't feel as crazy as this thing. I am frankly afraid of it now.
That's right. It's in my garage and I'm afraid to drive it because it's like a crazy steroid bull that wants to kill me.
I've done 130 mph on a Ducati while laughing into the face of death. The viper is a completely different bowl of crack. The engine sounds like 40 pit bulls eating kittens while lifting weights.
I cannot truly explain it's power. It has whiplash acceleration in 3rd gear at 60mph. That sentence doesn't even make sense. But it's true.
That's why I'm telling you. I will not have your soul on my conscience.
You need to know what you are getting into. What insane level of crazy you are buying.
Can you resist the urge to mash down the accelerator? Can you? CAN YOU?!
Because it's like owning your own demon. A demon that only wants to kill you. We all know one person that for the right amount of money would kill you. But since no one is paying, they smile in your face and go about their day.
It's like that, except the Viper doesn't bother to ever pretend it doesn't want to kill you.
And it will do it for free.

Some brilliant engineer designed a beautiful sexy bulging body, fantastic suspension, great handling, aerodynamics, and all American style. While he was out on his lunch break, some demented maniac dropped 100 times more engine power than necessary into it and sent it out the door. It's mentally and psychologically unbalanced. It is a Decepticon.

Look,
If you are the type of person that can be talked into having one more drink at midnight when you have a very important presentation or interview early the next morning, then the Viper is not for you.

The whole car is constantly whispering sweet lies to you.
"You got this".
"Open me up and ride free, you got this"
"What are you a wussy?"
"Just do it", "Do it", "you got this".

Do not do it. You don't got it. Turns out you ARE in fact a wussy. Because you don't want to die.
You will sit on the curb and settle your heart after it tries to kill you the first time.
You will get back inside and it will immediately get back to the business of trying to get you to let it murder you. You will park it and it will start its siren call again, tempting you to get into this murder machine.
"You got this. This time you know. That last time was just a fluke. You ain't no wussy".

Repeat after me.
You
Don't
Got
This.

I suggest you go hug your wife, forget you ever read this, and go and buy a nice comfy safe Toyota Corolla. Live to be a hundred. Or you can do all the stuff on your bucket list and THEN buy a Viper.


But if you insist, for $30k you can look the devil in the eye and take this ride.

You were warned. May God have mercy on your soul.

The Viper RT/10 Roadster has a 6-speed transmission! 11400 Super low miles!
2D - Transmission: 6-Spd Manual - Engine: V10, 8.0 Liter - Mileage: 11400 - ExtColor: Black - IntColor: Cognac - Features: Air Conditioning,Power Steering,Power Windows,Tilt Wheel,AM/FM Stereo,CD (Single Disc),ABS (4-Wheel),Leather,Premium Wheels.

A Seattle Motorcycle Club

Motorcycle Club

If you’re like me, then you dream of motorcycle riding. Well maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration, I tend to dream about Game of Thrones quite a bit these days. I however do try and watch every YouTube video and read every article I find on new bikes. The bike I really want to get my hands on these days is the redesigned MV Agusta Brutale 800, but unfortunately the local dealer doesn’t have any quite yet. Even if they did, they are a bit pricey and ownership might be costly considering MV makes high end Italian bikes.

 

That brings up a problem most hard working individuals seem to have, owning a motorcycle is a luxury. A motorcycle is great to cruise around town on or for commuting to work. I’ve been pretty happy when commuting to downtown Seattle using the carpool lane, flying past everyone else. When it comes to transporting kids, groceries, or family road trips though it kind of falls short. It also sucks traveling in the rain and the Pacific Northwest seems to have quite a bit of that. Luckily, we rarely get snow, which means we can ride a motorcycle all year round if we have rain gear.

 

Still though, it tends to be hard to justify owning a bike when you must also own a car. Owning a bike means an extra insurance payment. There are maintenance costs, and maintenance is normally pricy in comparison to a family sedan. If you own an Italian bike, expect that maintenance to be up there (Ducati I’m referring to you with your $179 oil changes). Luckily I live in a house so parking is free. When I lived downtown I paid $100 a month for an extra parking spot. That’s $1,200 a year just to park a bike. On top of that, one bike is never enough. I want a bad-boy looking cruiser for…well, cruising. I want a super-sport bike for carving up corners, I want an adventure bike for long distance cruising, and I want a naked for just plan around-town fun.

Harley_Ad

Each of these ads help illustrate the different lifestyle each bike offers.

Clockwise - Yamaha YZF-R1M, Harley-Davidson Iron 883, Ducati Monster 1200S, BMW R1200GS Adventure - Pictures courtesy of their respective manufacturers.

Then each bike is a bit different. A Ducati superbike looks amazing. Its beautiful lines are meant to impress. A Japanese bike on the other hand, like the new R1, is designed for functionality, performance. Each bike is different and offers its own positives and negatives. Getting a chance to ride each bike is amazing and when purchasing a bike you need to figure out which one suits you.

 

Still though, the questions for new riders is what class do you want to fit in with? Do you want to fit in with the Harley crowd? What about the guys & gals that ride a Ducati? That’s kind of the choice a new rider needs to make though. Which bike to buy?

 

There’s also upgrading. New riders should start on an entry bike, like a Harley-Davidson Iron or a Kawasaki Ninja 300. Later on, in like a year or two, you’ll probably want to upgrade. If you started on that Ninja you’ll now want a 600cc bike, then a 750cc or liter bike, then maybe something more like a 1299 or so. Then your back and wrists will start to hurt and you’ll switch over to an adventure touring bike or a cruiser, but you’ll miss the performance of your sportbikes. There again is a problem.

Ducati ads have always focused on style and performance and their bikes imitate that.

Ducati ads have always focused on style and performance and their bikes imitate that.

 

What if there was a solution? What if you could ride any bike, at any time, without worrying about all the minor details? What if you didn’t have to worry about paying for an extra parking space, maintenance, or insurance? What if you didn’t have to worry about upgrading a bike in a few years? Instead you’re on a 300 today and then tomorrow you decide you’re ready for a 600. What if today you want to carve up some corners on a Ducati Panigale and then tomorrow you want to cruise up to the mountains on a Harley with the significant other on the back? Sounds like a dream right? Maybe it is, but we could make it reality.

 

How? Well this business, Envy Exotics, was founded on that dream. The idea for this business was to be an auto and motorcycle club. Members would pay a small fee and get access to a wide range of vehicles. It would be similar to a gym really. When a member decided they wanted to ride a motorcycle, they’d use their phone, tablet, or computer to reserve a bike. If they reserved a bike and wanted it today because of perfect weather, than 1.5 hours later it would be there at their doorstep waiting for them. Each year we’d add new vehicles based upon what members wanted. This way we’d ensure we had the latest and greatest bikes customers wanted to ride.

What would you choose? A day of corner carving or an off-road adventure?

Ducati Monster 1200 S courtesy of Ducati USA

BMW R1200GS Adventure courtesy of BMW USA

That plan didn’t initially work out though. The banks didn’t believe in it. So additional funding was nonexistent. We started anyway. We couldn’t start as a club, because our fleet was too small, but it’s grown large enough now where it can work. We can make it work, especially if we add two more bikes this year.

 

That’s really what this article is about, the chance for residents of the Pacific Northwest to become owners in a motorcycle club. The article is to see if the demand exits. If it does we’ll turn this business into the club it was originally meant to be. We’ll still have regular rentals, we need that to continue to grow, but as a club we’ll grow as membership grows.

 

We’re still working on pricing to ensure we’re able to affordably store, maintain, insure, and delivery the bikes. We think we have an idea though and plan to announce pricing by next month if the demand exits. The question is do residents of the Pacific Northwest want this? If this is something you want let us know in the comments. We’d love to hear from you and get any ideas you may have. We want this to work and we hope you want this as well.

 

If you haven't already, fill out the below form and will send you an email when we figure out the details about the club, such as membership pricing and when it goes live.

Name
Name

 

Oh and by the way, here’s a great video that shows why it would be awesome to have so many choices when it comes to ridding. Enjoy!

Comming Soon

Update - 6/11/2016

Thanks to our customer's opinion we purchased two of the bikes from the survey. We bought a Yamaha YZF-R3 and a Triumph Daytona 675R.


We may have been over zealous with our last survey as the result were too close to pick a clear winner. We've taken the top ranked bikes in that survey and created a new list to find a clear champion to add to our fleet. We're hopping to make a decision on a new rental by next month. Help us decide with the survey below (pictures of the bikes are include to help with your decision).

Triumph Daytona 675R (Courtesy of Triumph)

Ducati Monster 1200 (Courtesy of Ducati USA)

Kawasaki Ninja 636 ZX-6R (Courtesy of Motorcycle USA)

Kawasaki Z1000 (Courtesy of Motorcycle USA)

Yamaha YZF-R3 (Courtesy of Motorcycle Daily)

MV Agusta F3 675 (Courtesy of MV Agusta)

MV Agusta Brutale 800 (Courtesy of MV Agusta)

Create your own user feedback survey

For devices where the embedded survey doesn't work here's a link. The link will open the survey in a separate window. https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/8NGBK5W

The 2015 BMW vs the 2016 Chevrolet Camaro SS

Have you seen the latest Chevrolet Camaro? In the SS trim it's equipped with the 6.2L LT1 small block V8, producing 455 horsepower and 455 lb-ft of torque, which is capable of propelling the Camaro to 60 mph in 4 seconds. Besides having impressive power the all new Camaro is equipped with an impressive interior, to include an optional heads-up-display, magnetic ride control, heated & vented seats, a heated steering wheel, drive mode selector, and impressive entertainment system and more. We love the the car, especially in blue, but don't our word for it. Check out Motor Trend's latest head to head where the 2016 Chevrolet Camaro SS takes on the 2015 BMW M4. Let us know in the comments which car you'd prefer.

Commuting on a Ducati Panigale

Image by Ducati

Read what it's like to ride the Ducati Panigale as a commuter bike over at R&T's website (link here). R&T's team does a good job explaining what makes the Ducati Panigale so special. Then book a future rental here at Envy Exotics to try a Panigale out for yourself on Washington's scenic roads.

Road & Track's Article

http://www.roadandtrack.com/car-culture/a26004/2015-ducati-1299-panigale-s/


Pictures of Envy Exotics' Ducati 1199 Panigale S

Nissan's GT-R on Ice

Britain’s famous automotive journalists at Top Gear recently tested three all-wheel-drive supercars on a frozen lake. The test was to compare the AWD systems of the Jaguar F-Type, Porsche 911 Turbo, and Nissan GT-R. I won’t spoil the article for you, as it’s a pretty good read (Check it out here). I will comment on the Nissan GT-R’s AWD system. I’ve spent plenty of time behind the wheel of a GT-R here in the Seattle, Washington area and have had the chance to drive and compare other supercars.

To start the GT-R’s all-wheel-drive system is amazing. It just goes and puts down power like nothing else. It’s like magic; or should we say magic on ice given Top Gear’s article?  Stomp on the gas and expect Nissan’s sophisticated AWD to figure out how to get you from 0-60 mph in less than 3 seconds. 2.7 seconds to 60-mph is Nissan’s fastest time in a stock 2013 GT-R with launch control.

The AWD system that allows the Nissan GT-R to be so quick is called the Advanced Total Traction Engineering System for All-terrain with Electronic Torque Split. Luckily the Nissan engineers shortened it to the acronym ATTESA ET-S so we didn’t run out of air after saying it to fans at the gas station. Unfortunately they still may look at us dumbfounded until we explain how it works. Luckily that’s the point of this article.

The way it works is a front-mounted twin-turbo V6 engine sends power through a carbon fiber drive shaft to the rear-mounted transaxle. There is then another drive-shaft running parallel to the main shaft that sends power back up to the front wheels. The result is a car that runs primarily in rear-wheel drive (98% of power to the rear and 2% to the front), but can shift to a 50/50 split when slippage is detected.

The Nissan GT-R's AWD System

Image by Nissan

Image by Nissan

To detect and prevent slippage there are a multitude of sensors and systems. There is a three-axis G sensor, gearbox and engine ECU sensors to control power, and 4 ABS sensors.   There is also a mechanical limited-slip differential and Nissan’s vehicle dynamics control system (VCR-R).

To simplify things, the way it works is the engine is going to send 98% of its power to the rear wheels. As soon as those wheels start to slip it diverts up to 50% of the power to the front wheels. If one of the front wheels start to slip by spinning faster than the other the ABS brakes are applied to that individual wheel until it slows down to match the speed that’s needed. If one of the rear wheels start to slip the mechanical limited-slip differential kicks in. If the engine is putting down too much power, say on a frozen lake, the engine will cut power until just the right amount is found. All of this is happening and being reevaluated in milliseconds.

The result of all this technology is perfect acceleration. The GT-R’s technology routes the exact amount of power to each wheel at the exact moment it’s needed. It allows for amazing launches, even on frozen lakes. It’s also why the numbers the GT-R puts out are so impressive.

Having driven a GT-R in various driving conditions I can attest to all of this. Tires still matter, but the stock tires are pretty good for every day driving here in Seattle. Mostly what I’ve driven the GT-R in is rain, and the GT-R is honestly unaffected.  

When I used to drive a C6 Corvette ZR1 it would slip all the time in the rain. Too much power and torque for rainy conditions. Of course this made it fun as I enjoyed drifting around a corner or having the rear end fishtail a bit. The 2013 Dodge Viper was the same way. To me this was a lot of fun, but it slowed the car down. The GT-R doesn’t have this problem. Hit the gas and get thrown in your seat as maximum power is applied.

To me the GT-R is an engineering masterpiece. The interior is starting to get outdated in comparison to newer supercars, but it’s still better than what most people are driving daily. The interior beats the inside of a Toyota Prius or Honda Accords after all. It’s rumored that the next Nissan GT-R will not show its face until at least 2018. I hope that’s not true, but if it is I’m sure it will be worth the wait. I’m sure Nissan’s team has something special in mind for us fans. I willing to bet the next GT-R will once again set the standard for a quick, relatively affordable, and roomy supercar.  I can’t wait.

 

If you would like to experience the amazing AWD system of the Nissan GT-R yourself book one for a weekend rental. One day rentals start at $600 and a two-day rental is only $1,000. It’s a pretty amazing value on a $100K+ car, and the performance is truly mind blowing for the value.

Read Top Gear's GT-R vs 911 Turbo vs Jag F-Typeon ice (external link)

The Nissan GT-R Hits the White Powder

Nissan's Official Video of testing the GT-R in adverse weather conditions (snow). The video is in Japanese with subtitles.

The 2017 Acura NSX

Understand the ins and outs of the 2017 Acura NSX. Understand what true Torque Vectoring is and how the new NSX utilizes it to make it a better supercar. Share your opinion of the 2017 NSX and let us know if it's something you'd like to drive in the future.

Dodge's Imperial March Ad for Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Regardless of what your feelings are about the Dodge Viper you have to admit Dodge made a pretty neat ad for the new movie Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

In our opinion the all black Viper ACR sure looks good as Kylo Ren (or is it Darth Vader still?) in front of all the other SRT vehicles portraying Storm Troopers.

We also think the ad fits with the Viper's attitude of being a super-car that holds nothing back and is willing to kill you at any display of weakness. With the Viper you have to embrace the dark side of the force....er... we mean the manual transmission and the big, naturally aspirated V-10 engine. That power sure feels good.

Next Envy Exotics Rental Motorcycle

NextBike

Update: This survey has been replaced with survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/8NGBK5W to help us narrow down a clear champion for our next rental motorcycle.


We didn't want to leave out motorcyclists. What do you think should be Envy Exotics next motorcycle? Should we stick with performance oriented sport-bikes and superbikes? Go towards more adventure bikes? Should we switch to cruisers from Harley-Davidson and classics like the Honda Gold Wing?

Help us decide what should be our next motorcycle purchase.

Create your own user feedback survey